The baby is in
The crib is in The room is in The house is in The neighborhood is in The town is in The city is in The state is in The country is in The world is in The solar system is in The milky way is in The universe
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Just some things from J.K. Rowling's old website: Opening Chapters of Philosopher's StoneThere were many different versions of the first chapter of 'Philosopher's Stone' and the one I finally settled on is not the most popular thing I've ever written; lots of people have told me that they found it hard work compared with the rest of the book. The trouble with that chapter was (as so often in a Harry Potter book) I had to give a lot of information yet conceal even more. There were various versions of scenes in which you actually saw Voldemort entering Godric's Hollow and killing the Potters and in early drafts of these, a Muggle betrayed their whereabouts. As the story evolved, however, and Pettigrew became the traitor, this horrible Muggle vanished. Other drafts included a character by the name of 'Pyrites', whose name means 'fool's gold'. He was a servant of Voldemort's and was meeting Sirius in front of the Potters' house. Pyrites, too, had to be discarded, though I quite liked him as a character; he was a dandy and wore white silk gloves, which I thought I might stain artistically with blood from time to time. The very, very earliest drafts of the first chapter of 'Philosopher's Stone' have the Potters living on a remote island, Hermione's family living on the mainland, her father spotting something that resembles an explosion out at sea and sailing out in a storm to find their bodies in the ruins of their house. I can't remember now why I thought this was a good idea, but I clearly recognised that it wasn't fairly early on, because the Potters were re-located to Godric's Hollow for all subsequent drafts. Chamber of Secrets: Dean Thomas' BackgroundAnybody who has read both the American and British versions of 'Philosopher's Stone' will notice that Dean Thomas's appearance is not mentioned in the British book, whereas in the American one there is a line describing him (in the chapter 'The Sorting Hat'). This was an editorial cut in the British version; my editor thought that chapter was too long and pruned everything that he thought was surplus to requirements. When it came to the casting on the film version of 'Philosopher's Stone', however, I told the director, Chris, that Dean was a black Londoner. In fact, I think Chris was slightly taken aback by the amount of information I had on this peripheral character. I had a lot of background on Dean, though I had never found the right place to use it. His story was included in an early draft of 'Chamber of Secrets' but then cut by me, because it felt like an unnecessary digression. Now I don't think his history will ever make it into the books. Dean is from what he always thought was a pure Muggle background. He has been raised by his mother and his stepfather; his father walked out on the family when Dean was very young. He has a very happy home life, with a number of half-brothers and sisters. Naturally when the letter came from Hogwarts Dean's mother wondered whether his father might have been a wizard, but nobody has ever discovered the truth: that Dean's father, who had never told his wife what he was because he wanted to protect her, got himself killed by Death Eaters when he refused to join them. The projected story had Dean discovering all this during his school career. I suppose in some ways I sacrificed Dean's voyage of discovery for Neville's, which is more important to the central plot. Goblet of Fire: Mafalda, Ron's cousinI have spoken before now about the Weasley cousin who made it quite a long way into 'Goblet of Fire' before I cut her. I really liked her as a character and did not want to sacrifice her, but she just wasn't doing the job she was supposed to do so she had to go. Mafalda was the daughter of the 'second cousin who's a stockbroker' mentioned in 'Philosopher's Stone'. This stockbroker had been very rude to Mr. and Mrs. Weasley in the past, but now he and his (Muggle) wife had inconveniently produced a witch, they came back to the Weasleys asking for their help in introducing her to wizarding society before she starts at Hogwarts. The Weasleys agreed to taking her for part of the Summer, including the Quidditch World Cup, but regretted this almost immediately. Mrs. Weasley suspected that Mafalda's parents simply wanted to get rid of her for a while, because she turns out to be the most unpleasant child Mrs. Weasley has ever met. Mafalda was supposed to convey certain information about the Death Eaters to Harry, Ron and Hermione, because as a nosy, eavesdropping Slytherin who likes to impress, she does not keep her mouth shut when she overhears their sons and daughters talking. Unfortunately, however bright I made her, there were obvious limitations to what an eleven year old closeted at school could discover, whereas Rita Skeeter, whom I subsequently built up to fulfil Mafalda's function, was much more flexible. The best thing about Mafalda was that she was a match for Hermione. To the latter's horror, Mafalda was highly gifted and a real show-off, so that Hermione was torn between deploring the rule-breaking and longing to join in and beat her. Goblet of Fire: Mopsy the dog loverWhen Padfoot returns in 'Goblet of Fire', I initially had him stay with a highly- eccentric, dog-loving old witch on the edge of Hogsmeade. She kept a pack of ill-assorted dogs, was on constant bad terms with her neighbours because of the barking and the mess, and had welcomed in Sirius, assuming him to be a stray.
I think my editor was quite right to ask me to get rid of Mopsy, because she added nothing to the plot. I just liked portraying a batty dog-lover (as opposed to batty cat-lover Mrs. Figg). However, it made more sense to stow Sirius in a nice simple cave to have Harry, Ron, Hermione and Sirius's chat about Barty Crouch Jnr. without distractions.
So, it's been a while since I've posted here. A recent event has prompted me to make a rare update. This year while beginning our writing process, I had students produce amazing rough drafts as they explored working through their writer's block and finding ideas to go run with. However once we move into revising and editing their works, I was met with a chorus of "Do I have to edit?" and "What if I don't have anything to change?" Here's an video I'll be using in the future when introducing drafts:
Last year I struggled to produce a good real life example, but I finally got on it to ask other teachers about it. So here it is: some examples of writers revising their works! Also, please let me know in the comments if you know of any other examples of editing in famous works of literature and movies! Harry potter: Have you heard of mafalda?
The answer is mostly likely, not. An interesting fact which I didn't know about until now was that there was a character which was cut from Goblet of Fire. In the words of J.K. Rowling herself:
"I have spoken before now about the Weasley cousin who made it quite a long way into 'Goblet of Fire' before I cut her. I really liked her as a character and did not want to sacrifice her, but she just wasn't doing the job she was supposed to do so she had to go. Mafalda was the daughter of the 'second cousin who's a stockbroker' mentioned in 'Philosopher's Stone'. This stockbroker had been very rude to Mr. and Mrs. Weasley in the past, but now he and his (Muggle) wife had inconveniently produced a witch, they came back to the Weasleys asking for their help in introducing her to wizarding society before she starts at Hogwarts. The Weasleys agreed to taking her for part of the Summer, including the Quidditch World Cup, but regretted this almost immediately. Mrs. Weasley suspected that Mafalda's parents simply wanted to get rid of her for a while, because she turns out to be the most unpleasant child Mrs. Weasley has ever met. Mafalda was supposed to convey certain information about the Death Eaters to Harry, Ron and Hermione, because as a nosy, eavesdropping Slytherin who likes to impress, she does not keep her mouth shut when she overhears their sons and daughters talking. Unfortunately, however bright I made her, there were obvious limitations to what an eleven year old closeted at school could discover, whereas Rita Skeeter, whom I subsequently built up to fulfil Mafalda's function, was much more flexible. The best thing about Mafalda was that she was a match for Hermione. To the latter's horror, Mafalda was highly gifted and a real show-off, so that Hermione was torn between deploring the rule-breaking and longing to join in and beat her." ©2004 J.K. Rowling. All Rights Reserved. Zootopia: the original plot that was abandoned
The original concept for Zootopia was for the predatory animals to need a taming collar to be members of society. The collars would give their wearers a zap if they get too excited, preventing them from going back to their savage ways, but also limiting their emotions.
This concept remained in the movie for a while into production--they had even begun animating scenes. Disney Animation Studios gave an early screening of the movie to Pixar halfway through production, and the response: "You can tell the story without the collars. Zootopia is simply not a world in which we want to spend our time if half the population is shackled." The themes of racism became darker and Judy Hopps' role outweighed Nick Wilde's even though the initial concept more heavily centered around him. Despite the film being far into production, Disney decided that for the sake of a better story, they needed to change this element, which is why you don't see these collars in the movie. Instead, they explain in the beginning that the predators evolved out of their savage ways. Because of Winn Dixie: The Author's own reflection
Download the file above to see how Because of Winn Dixie changed over the course of six drafts. Kate DiCamillo has some interesting things to say about the writing process. I would probably have students break students into groups with a copy of the finished book in front of the to compare the final to the draft. Also, I would have them highlight meaningful quotes from the author regarding the writing process as I did above. She has some amazing things to say about it!
Here are the general editing marks I use when looking over students' work. The frustrating thing is when I get papers back without any changes being made!
Do you want to know a secret? I hated writing as a kid, and even as an adult, I still don't find a whole lot of enjoyment in writing essays. However, school and essay writing will always go together. My saving grace through all these papers has been the writing process!
In my brainstorming phase I'm a personal fan of the bubble map (web/cloud map whatever people call it these days). I like to write my ideas on Post-its and move them around and group them together. The end result is usually quite pretty, and I usually end up transferring it down into an outline. The drafting phase is my hardest step. Writer's block usually strikes at least 4 or 5 times on a good day. However, once I have something half decent it all comes down to the editing phase. Have you ever polished rocks before? When you first find a rock you think has potential it's jagged and rough just like any other rock on the ground. However you put it through a tumbler to polish so that the end result is something that looks like the rocks you buy at souvenir shops. The editing step is your tumbler. With rocks it can take days in a tumbler to get out all the sharp edges and divots, so don't be discouraged if your editing and revising process takes a while as well. It's certainly worth it in the end. Diagram.ly
Venn Diagram Maker (Double Bubble) Cause and Effect When it comes to expanding your vocabulary, the best advice I can give is to read, read, read! You can also use a handy dandy thesaurus or dictionary. For the sake of finding something useful, though, here are a few cheat sheet graphics. Please feel free to comment and link me to any other vocabulary-building pictures you find!
I confess that punctuation was not my strong point in writing until middle school where a very dedicated and patient English teacher made it her goal to drill proper punctuation use into her students. Here are a few rules to using commas:
1. Compound Sentences A compound sentence contains two complete thoughts. Place a comma before the word "and" or "but" in a compound sentence. The fifth grade played outside yesterday, but they had to play inside today. Notice that I can have two stand-alone sentences if I take away "but" (the compound word): The fifth grade played outside yesterday. They had to play inside today. 2. Words in a List Use commas to separate three or more words in a list. Ms. Urabe's favorite shows are Steven Universe, Doctor Who, and Frontline. 3. Dependent Clauses A dependent clause has a subject and a verb but cannot stand alone. Place a comma after a dependent clause that begins a sentence. When it rains, I like to stay inside and read a book. After I open a book, I immediately feel relaxed. If I don't have a good book to read, I'll watch one of my favorite shows. Notice that "When it rains," "After I open a book," and "If I don't have a good book to read" are not complete sentences on their own. 4. Appositive An appositive is a word or group of words that explains another word in a sentence. Use commas to set off an appositive from the rest of the sentence. Mrs. Iwase, the principal, gave a speech today in the cafeteria. 5. Introductory Words Place a comma after introductory words, such as yes, no and well. Yes, you may use the restroom. 6. Direct Address Use a comma to separate from the rest of the sentence the name of a person the sentence addresses directly. Ms. Urabe, may I use the restroom? 7. Cities and States Place a comma between the names of cities and states. We live in Honolulu, Hawaii. 8. Dates Place a comma between the day and the year in a date. The date that I wrote this was on December 2, 2015. It's one of the first lessons we learn as writers and yet time and time again, I see that students still forget which words should be capitalized!
Words that are capitalized:
Think you know how to capitalize properly? Then try out these quizzes! Quiz 1 Quiz 2 Quiz 3 Quiz 4 It's so important to plan before writing. It gets your ideas flowing and onto paper (even if it might not make much sense to begin with). I admit that I struggle as a writer, but being able to effectively brainstorm and organize my thoughts has helped my writing tremendously. The tools used at my school are "Thinking Maps" which is a form of graphic organizers. Most of the pictures have been taken from this site. Here is a list of the various thinking maps which are used: Circle Maps This map is what I like to think of as a "brain dump." Yout main idea is in the smallest circle. Your connections and ideas go inside the larger circle. Outside the big circle is your frame of reference (where you have heard or seen your topic). Download Bubble Maps These maps are like your conventional web graphic organizer. You main idea goes in the center with bigger subtopics branching off of it. Download Double Bubble Maps Double bubble maps can be seen as another way of creating a Venn Diagram which shows similarities and differences between two things. Download Flow Map The flow map shows a sequence of events. You answer the questions: "What happened?" "In what order did it happen?" Download Brace Map Brace maps look at the whole of something and breaks it down into its major parts and subparts. Download Multi-Flow Map This is basically a cause and effect map. You have a central event and then look at what caused it and what are its effects. Download Tree Map With a tree map you answer these questions: "What sort of thing is this?" "What are the sub-categories?" "What other things can go into these sub-categories?" Download Bridge Map
Truthfully, I don't see the point of this one since it just focuses on one element of a literary device. It doesn't really help with the brainstorming process as a whole which is why I've put this one last. Use if you have trouble with similes. Download Excerpts taken from bid4papers
Essay hooks ideas
Examples: “So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.” These words of Nick Carraway perfectly describe…” “Not all those who wander are lost.” And yes, indeed, every person is so…” Examples: “John Wooden once said, ‘Never mistake activity for achievement.'” “Learn to laugh” is something my kindergarten teacher told me after Ralph Thorsen spilled paint on my daffodil picture. Examples: “As my cousin and I pedaled our new bikes to the beach, 6 years old, suntanned and young, we met an old, shaggy-haired man weaving unsteadily on a battered old bike.” “When I was a young boy, my father worked at a coal mine. For 27 years, he made it his occupation to scrape and claw and grunt his way into the bowels of the earth, searching for fuel. On April 19, 2004, the bowels of the earth clawed back.” But remember, that in most cases it is not allowed to use the first person in essays, that is why check everything twice before using “I” in your paper. Examples: “What would you do if you could play God for a day? That’s exactly what the leaders of the tiny island nation of Guam tried to answer.” “Have you ever wondered, whether Anna Karenina still loved Alexei if she hadn’t decided to commit a suicide?” Examples: “The day of his birth began with Hurricane Charlie pounding at our door in Charleston, South Carolina.” “Deciding to attend Hampton Roads Academy, a private school, was one of my most difficult decisions.” Examples: “Spain, though hardly a literary juggernaut, translates more books in one year than the entire Arab world has in the past one thousand years.” “Amiable is the best way to describe Elizabeth’s personality: she was friendly and caring.” Examples: “The average iceberg weighs over 100,000 metric tons.” “70% of all jobs found today were got through different networking strategies” |